Love and trusting, p.1
Love and Trusting, page 1
LOVE & TRUSTING
WHEN THE HEART TRUSTS
HEALING HEARTS
BOOK TWO
KACEY THORNE
CONTENTS
Quote
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Acknowledgments
Author Note
About the Author
Also by kacey
Healing Hearts
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2023
Kacey Thorne
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or used in any manner without written permission of the copyright owner except for the use of quotations in a book review.
ISBN: 979-8-223-64514-6
www.kaceythorne.com
DEDICATION
To my friends, past and present, who have been the chapters in the story of my life. Each of you has been a lesson, and a stepping stone on the path of learning.
Trust is the foundation of all meaningful connections.
1
My heart raced as Joe stood in the door to my office, his smile stretching wide across his face. It felt surreal, almost like a dream, that it had been a whole two months since I’d last seen him, since we’d been lost in each other’s arms. The disbelief quickly melted into an intense joy, a kind of euphoria that flooded my senses. It's as if every part of me was heightened – my heart racing, my skin tingling, and my stomach fluttering. Everything confirmed to me how much I loved the man standing in front of me.
Together, Joe and I were like something out of a fairy tale. Despite the miles that separated us, our love had only grown in ways I’d never imagined it could. Happiness seemed like too small a word for what I felt with him.
“Joe, what are you doing here?” My voice was a mix of awe and excitement as I raced around my desk to meet him.
His hands found mine in a strong, reassuring grip that was all things Joe. “I just needed to see you,” he said, his voice low and earnest. “I couldn’t wait any longer.”
His lips met mine, and a wave of warmth washed over me. It was as if no time had passed at all since we were last together. I wrapped my arms around him, clinging to the moment. As we parted, our eyes locked, and it hit me – I was falling for him all over again, deeper with every second.
Joe took my hand and began leading me outside. “Where are we going?” I asked, a flutter of excitement dancing in my stomach.
“Just wait and see,” he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief.
“I can’t just leave work,” I protested, turning to face my boss, who had quietly approached.
“Don’t worry about it,” Joe reassured, nodding towards Jules, who was smiling in agreement.
“You’re really not going to give me a hint?” I pressed, both amused and curious.
“No clues,” Joe replied with the most gorgeous grin on his face.
Trust Joe to surprise me with something spontaneous. He looked as handsome as ever as I admired him from my seat next to him. I felt so lucky to be right here with him at this very moment. It was hard living so far apart, but whenever Joe was near, my heart felt fuller than I could ever have imagined. I had never felt so alive, so happy, so loved.
“Are you up here for work?” Still grappling with the reality that he was here.
He laughed, a sound that warmed my heart. “No, Em, I told you I had to see you.”
“You came all the way to New York just for me?”
“Yes,” Joe chuckled. “Come on, you can’t find that hard to believe, can you?”
But I did; I had never meant that much to someone in my life before. I had never felt so loved before that sometimes it just didn’t feel real like it was all a dream. A dream I was terrified of losing.
At last, Joe and I reached a hidden beach, a perfect slice of tranquility. Joe, ever thoughtful, had packed a picnic. He spread a blanket on the sand just as the sun started to dip towards the horizon. Its rays bathed the beach in a soft, orange hue, creating a magical backdrop against the gentle lapping of the waves.
“Not a bad way to end a week, huh?” Joe said as he pulled out a bottle of champagne and two glasses.
“This is perfect, I love it.” I wrapped my arms around him, inhaling into his neck.
“I love you, Emily,” Joe whispered in my ear.
“I love you too, Joe,” I replied, releasing him from my grasp. Joe poured us a glass of champagne, and we sat together on the laid-out picnic blanket.
“I bought an extra blanket in case you got cold.” Joe had thought about everything; he always thought about everything, a trait that never ceased to amaze me.
We talked and laughed as we ate, catching up on everything that had happened since we had last seen each other. Even though Joe and I spoke every day, being together in person added a layer of intimacy to our words. Joe asked how my book was going and how being back in the office doing the radio show had been. Joe told me about his work and the opportunities he could sense were on the horizon. An opening to share emotions and challenges held back from our phone conversations. I felt like I could talk to Joe about anything, and he listened attentively, his eyes never leaving mine.
We lay together, wrapped in each other’s arms, as the first few stars appeared, their subtle glistening in the dusky sky.
“Thanksgiving, my family has invited us for dinner, and your mom and dad too. I think it’s maybe time for them to meet you, don’t you think?” Joe’s suggestion of introducing me to his family felt like a significant milestone, one that left me unsure of whether I was truly ready or not.
I took a moment to compose myself, hoping to conceal my nervousness, before responding, “Wow, yes, of course, Joe. I’d love to.” Despite my attempt to appear enthusiastic, there was a slight tremor in my voice that betrayed my apprehension.
Joe chuckled, perhaps picking up on my unease, “Are you sure?”
Taking a deep breath, I mustered a more confident smile and replied, “Absolutely sure. I’m excited to meet your family.” It wasn’t a lie; I was excited, but I still knew there was a part of me that felt this anxiety and shyness that overcame me when it came to meeting new people, especially those of Joe’s family. Joe meant so much to me, and with Izzy in the back of my mind, I felt as if I had some big shoes to fill.
“And your mom and dad? Do you think they will come? I know it seems like a big step, but my family will love yours, I promise.”
“They will come; I know they will love you too; you’re the only thing they ever ask me about these days,” I laughed.
“Be a good chance for you to get down to Charleston too.”
There it was. My guilt came rushing in, and my defense peaking. “I do want to get down to Charleston more to see you, I really do, but you know it’s been an adjustment lately with trying to finish the book and being back in the office.” I tailed off with a sigh.
“I don’t mean that, Em; I just know you still seem a little bit apprehensive about Charleston altogether.”
I looked up at Joe and could feel him knowing all my thoughts. “I just,” I hesitated. “I think a lot about it, about us. I know that if this is going to work, long term, one of us has to move, and —”
“Hey, we aren’t talking about moving just now, and when that time comes, we can have that discussion. There are options for both of us; I have thought about it, too. But for now, we are just talking Thanksgiving dinner.” Joe reached for my hands. “I don’t want you to go worrying your mind over who’s living where right now; it’s just dinner.”
“I’m sorry, I get myself worked up over these things; I want this more than anything.”
“I know,” Joe replied. “But Emily, you don’t have to worry. I want to share my life with you, and right now, a big part of that is in Charleston. No matter where we might live in the future, life is happening right now. I really want you to spend time with me there, too.”
I shook my head to shake away the thoughts. I felt silly for jumping to conclusions. Joe would never hold it against me that he seemed to come to me so often, but I understood he wanted me to get to know his life, too. I nodded. “It’s only fair, right? You’ve seen every part of my life here, but I have yet to see so much of yours. I’ll come down more, I promise.”
“Have you heard back from your agent yet?” Joe switched the subject.
“I’m meeting with her on Monday; I’m so nervous; what if no one goes for it?”
Joe placed his hand on my chin, tilting it upward towards his, “Em, I'm sure your book is amazing; don’t be so hard on yourself. Publishers take forever with these things. You’ll hear, don’t worry.” He kissed me on my forehead.
“You must think I worry about everything.”
Joe chuckled. “Just a little.”
The night grew darker and colder, and before long, we packed up the picnic and headed back toward home. Joe was always so thoughtful; he never planned a boring date night. On the other hand, I felt as if I hardly planned any. I wanted to do more for Joe, and I planned on doing just that. I also knew he was right about Charleston. I felt as if it was on my mind constantly since Joe and I decided to make a go of things. Joe once said he’d never move to New York, and I cannot shake the dreaded feeling I get whenever I think about Charleston. Even though Joe is now a part of my life, I just can’t imagine that going back would be my step forward. I didn’t know what I was going to do.
“So when do I get to meet the elusive Joe?” Amanda asked after sharing with her the news of Thanksgiving.
I had just said my goodbyes to Joe at the airport, and it was never any easier than the last time. With Thanksgiving only three weeks away, it wasn’t long before I would be back in his arms. Still, the thought of meeting his family had me excited and equally nervous.
“I know, I know we must do dinner one night, the four of us. You will love him, Amanda.”
“I love him already; I’ve never seen you this happy, Em. I can’t believe the effect he has had on you these past few months. Have you guys discussed much about future plans?”
“Well, thanksgiving dinner is a first big step; I meet his parents, and he meets mine.”
“I mean, where you guys are going to live? You can’t do long distance forever.”
I picked up a cushion from Amanda’s sofa and held it close. “It’s killing me already. I can’t get it out of my head. I suck at this long-distance thing. But I just don’t know what we are going to do.”
“Have you two talked about it?”
“Not really. Joe said when the time comes, we will have the discussion and that there are options for both of us, but I don’t know Amanda, I can’t see him ever moving to New York and me moving back to Charleston?” I sighed.
“It’s going to be a lot of sacrifice and compromise on both parts; relationships are full of them. If you love each other, then you can make it work.”
“I love him so much, Amanda, so much it scares me. We fell so quickly, and now, trying to navigate things miles apart, it feels like my head is running a marathon constantly.”
“Maybe you need to have the discussion sooner rather than later? No one has to make any decisions, but you need to be honest with each other about where things stand in that regard, don’t you think?”
“I don’t want him to think I’m ready to dive into living together right now.”
“Are you?”
“No, not yet. I hate being so far away from him, but our lives are still so separate. I’m not ready to share my space just yet.”
“Understandable, but Joe has lived on his own for three years; maybe he might be ready sooner than you think.”
I hadn’t thought about that. But if Joe was ready, he’d have bought it up, I am sure, and he said there were options for both of us. Would he ever move here? It was driving me crazy, not knowing.
Amanda raced up to help Robin, who had just returned home carrying arms of groceries.
“I best be going,” I said as I walked towards the kitchen.
“Stay for dinner, Emily?”
“Thanks, Robin, not tonight, big day tomorrow.”
“Oh, that’s right, you’re meeting with your agent, right?” Amanda interrupted.
I nodded in an attempt to hide my anxiousness.
“You’ll be fine. Your book is amazing, Emily. I believe in you.”
“How do you know?.” I laughed. No one had read it. No one but Marcia and whoever else she had sent it to; I wondered how many of them had actually even read it.
“Because you wrote it.”
“I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“And don’t forget our double date,” Amanda added excitedly.
“Double date?” Robin asked, confused.
“We are finally going to get to meet Emily’s Joe,” she clapped her hands in excitement.
“When is all this happening?” Robin liked to be organized and plan ahead.
“Once Emily organizes it.”
Robin rolled his eyes playfully, knowing Amanda had gotten ahead of herself.
“You better call me tomorrow,” Amanda called back as I slipped through the front door.
“Love you,” I sounded back as I closed the door behind me.
It suddenly felt like everything was happening at once. Meeting Joe’s Parents. Joe meeting mine, parents meeting each other, Amanda meeting Joe, my possible book deal. On top of that, I knew Joe and I needed to start the conversations of the future. As good as things were now, there were questions that were going to need answering.
2
I could tell by the look on Marcia Brown's face when I entered her office I was about to be let down.
"Look, Emily, It's a great idea; the writing is good. It's just not what the publishers are after at the moment."
I nodded without replying. I had tried not to get my hopes up, but I couldn't help but feel disappointed that this meeting wasn't going in the direction I had anticipated.
"You are a fantastic journalist, Emily, but fiction writing is a whole other ball game. I can tell you're passionate and excited about this, but perhaps you need —" she tailed off while looking for the right words. "Have you thought about going back to school? Maybe a night class?"
"You think I need more training?"
"It's more about learning from other writers, bouncing ideas, techniques; you will learn a lot from others, learning the same craft, finding your voice, being part of a community."
I didn't know what to say. I had half expected this, but now that reality was setting in, I felt like I'd let down more than just myself. Josie, Joe, Amanda, my mom and dad, my work, and everyone who knew what this new pathway meant to me. But I also knew if it meant that much to me, I'd do anything I needed to to make me a better writer. I nodded again in agreement. "Any recommendations?"
"Professor Hawthorne." She replied as she handed me a card. "He's a little eccentric and a little unconventional with his teaching methods, but that is what makes him so good. I have had a lot of his students through these doors and many who have sat right where you are. You got this, Emily, if you are willing to give it a try?"
I liked Marcia; she wasn't cutthroat like I imagined others in her line of work to be. Night school, that was going to be new.
"Thanks, Marcia, I appreciate it. What do I do with this, then?" I held my manuscript up.
"Detach yourself from it. Go see Professor Hawthorne, take an open mind, and open up an empty page. Write something new. Find your voice. Come back to it later, and you'll see what needs to be done." Marcia was as supportive as she could be, but she would have this conversation time and time again with aspiring authors. I wasn't anyone special.
I felt a single tear roll down my cheek once I was back in the car. I felt defeated. Why did I think this was going to be my big break? I knew firsthand how hard it had been to work my way up in journalism; why would this be any different?
